Revive or let it go? Need answers?

My ex and I had been over for 5 months already. It was a very painful break-up. We been together for a year and a half. We were inseparable...problem was were I was scared to give my heart away due to a very bad relationship I had in the past that did some emotional damage on me. �Not only that, my home life was in shambles. Vice versa on her part, she was also scared. The biggest con was distance. We were far apart and we couldn't be around each other like we wanted to. We were busy most of the time, but still contacted each other. I tried to move closer but too many things were going on, plus she thought it would be a bad idea because she didn't want me to leave anything I know. Still I was gonna try cause I love her. We began to argue about how bad this relationship is and it's hurting us. We were both afraid we would find somebody else since we couldn't see each other. We began to resent each other and would break up. The thing is, we couldn't let each other go. Even if said we were done, we just wouldn't.. So we would ended up back in circles. Make-up and break-up.. I took take action and move closer to her to save us. But she dumped me for someone else. I was devastated. Angry, hurt. Depress i knew she resented me but loved me. So I contacted her and it turns out she dumped the other girl. We began to talk but resent changed everything , So I stop talking to her. Then my friends told me how much she resented me and wish she never met me but still thought about me. It hurt me so bad that she would say things like that. So I just sent a email saying I'll be out of her life and how bad this hurt but she never responded. We don't talk anymore and she act like I never exist. Friends say she still talk about me. She even flirting with a other girl. I tried to move on and I even met someone but I still think about her and wonder if she thinks about me. It's killing me and I don't know what to do.